Building Stability by Wilberg Rivera 

Whether we realize it or not, humans instinctively gravitate towards the total sum of their personal history to make important decisions about their future. Decision making inevitably becomes a multi-tier calculation of needs, desires, fears, and outlook. Until something hits your carefully curated internal decision making apparatus that totally challenges your strongly held beliefs, you just live in a cycle of re-incarnated patterns of behavior. Some people adapt better and more quickly than others to any environment that breaks their ideological routine. How do you learn to make better decisions in a continually hostile environment that goes against every grain of our deeply held beliefs and ambitions?

First, you need to accept when you are wrong about something when you evaluate newly available information that makes you uneasy or concerned. If it is a stinging rejection of your belief structure regarding the issue at hand, you need to learn to take a step back, breathe, evaluate your options, and make your move on a critical turning point in your life. There is no such thing as perfect information in a hostile environment and many people may never agree on what is considered fact, fiction, misinterpretation, or unilateral conjecture (gut instinct). The human instinct is to withdraw at the first sign of conflict. Very few people are able to accept rejection and change their perspective that is better grounded in reality. Adaptability is the most important attribute in building long term stability in high pressure life environments and careers. You will not be able to immediately accept a deeply challenging belief (or absorb your frustration) if you don’t slow down, zoom out, and look at the broader picture and operational environment. To build stability you have to learn to completely tune out noise that is meant to be harmful or diminutive. You have to learn to trust those around you when they know what they’re talking about and correct your reaction or route based on the people, sources, and information you trust most. To find your center,  you have to let go of all decisions that hinge on your ego emotions. 

It’s important to detach yourself mentally from people and environments that don’t have the best information and are only trying to manipulate you away from your goal for their own benefit. You have to learn to embrace discomfort and fight through many emotional trip-wires to find your long term stability. And if you get it wrong, it is never too late to change past behaviors and completely start over.